How To Be A Stand Up Clown

Steve “Salty” Kissell

 

Sooner or later, my friends, you will be asked to MC an event or to do “your thing” out of makeup.  You may be asked to perform a stand up comedy act without the aid of a rubber nose.  Imagine that!  It may be a challenge to drop your clown pants and put on a dress or tuxedo, but it can be done!   As Kerri Scrugg’s gymnastic coach would say, “You can do it!”

Many of the clown props and magic tricks can be used in a more refined environment.  You may need to leave the rubber chicken, squirting flower and whoopee cushion at home in exchange for the silk-to-cane, dove production or the flaming book.  Of course, these routines are not me.  I am more of a comedy magician and like to use a funny sign bit or mind reading routine.  You will need to find out which props and routines work best with your personality.

Look at it as a challenge to grow to work outside your comfort zone and to expand the services that you can provide!  Some great stand up routines available are the Comedy Library Card by Ken Scott available at KenScottMagic.com.  This is a very clever routine designed to encourage children to read.  To put it simply it is a collection of 3 giant playing cards and a child is urged to locate a card.  When the card is removed from the rest of them, the card mysteriously changes into a giant library card.  It’s inexpensive, packs small and plays very big.    “How To Be A Great MC” book/tape and video package will give you a well-rounded look at patter, puns, punchlines and more from the MC’s you admire most.    Dick Stoner has a great routine called Grave Mistake.  This is a fun routine about telephone solicitors and a funeral home director.  This and the Instant MC signs and audiotape are available from Steve Kissell by calling 800-523-4887 or e-mail: KissellTalks@cs.com.  Joe Lefler has a laptop stand and case that allows you to MC from a stage that provides no podium.  Simply by using a briefcase, or larger type case, fitted with a computer laptop stand will make it very convenient to walk out in front of the curtain, open your case, perform, close your case and walk off the curtain.  You can reach him at joe@wearefun.com.

Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty.  Where do you find your material suitable for the stage?  My favorite thing to do is to use improv or to customize a program with information I have already obtained from the meeting planner or contact.  I like to roast the sponsors a bit in a good clean humored way.  You must be sure that you use this with respect.  There can only be one Don Rickles in this life.  

One of the best techniques that I’d like share with you for performing is brainstorming.  Always write ideas down.  A famous person once said, “Don’t just think it - ink it.”  That is to say that when you come up with an idea, you need to write it down on something.  I write ideas constantly whether I am in church, at a funeral, a ball game, or a business meeting.  When the idea pops in my head I write it down and put it in a safe place for later use.  Once you begin this process you will discover the ideas come quicker and quicker. 

Let’s discuss for a moment originality.  Do your best not to knock off someone else’s work.  Be as original as you possibly can.  That way, the audience will be constantly surprised.  That’s not to say to avoid acquiring ideas you can adapt from other performers, but customize it to fit your personality. 

Contests between the men and women or the boys and girls in the audience is great fun.  I sometimes have prizes for all the participants.  One patriotic game that I love to play is to hand out miniature American flags to the person at the end of each row.  Then I play the song Grand Old Flag.  The flagholder is instructed to stand, hold the flag up high, salute it, sit down and pass it to their neighbor.  The fun is getting the flags across the auditorium.  The first row to do this applauds themselves.  The game continues as the flags return back across the auditorium.  This is a game that everyone can play whether they are in a wheelchair or not and involves all ages.